A Journey of Support: How an Unexpected Decision Led to New Possibilities

In an unexpected twist of life, I found myself signing up for the NAPOLCOM Entrance Exam — something I honestly never planned. It all started from a simple desire to support the people I care about the most.

It began with my then-boyfriend, who was so eager to take the exam. Knowing how hard it was to secure a slot for the online filing, I reached out to my sister and asked if she could help him register. That time, lisod kaayo makasulod sa system, pero sige lang, basta makasuporta lang ko niya, go ra gyud ko.

But of course, di ko kutob ana. I also encouraged my younger sibling to try filing too. Who knows, maybe we’d both make it? The more, the merrier, diba?

When the day for online registration came, my sister was able to secure a slot for both my boyfriend and my sibling. Grabe jud to nga swerte, kay halos tanan magreklamo nga di makasulod sa portal.

Then, out of nowhere, I suddenly said, “Apila pud ko!” — and we all laughed. I didn’t even plan it; it just slipped out. But then I thought, why not join them? It would be fun, and besides, it’s nice to have company along the way. Who knows, basin makapasar pud ko ba!

As the exam day got closer, it ended up being just me and my boyfriend reviewing together. My sibling couldn’t continue because of their own board exam, so the two of us na lang ang nagpadayon.

Honestly, I wasn’t even nervous. I joined just for the experience, to show support, and to enjoy the ride. Busy man mi both with work, but we still found time to review a bit. My goal was simple — makalingaw lang, no pressure.

A week before the exam, my ever-thoughtful mama said she would come with us. She suggested we stay at my niece’s apartment, which was near the venue. That really helped us save time and money. Plus, mas kampante ko knowing Mama was there to look after us.

On the day of the exam, grabe ka-init and daghan kaayong tao. I was surprised to see so many police officers taking the Promotional Exam, too. Then my boyfriend — being his usual self — forgot his pencil and test permit! Mao tong nidagan siya balik sa apartment. Typical niya jud, hahaha.

We were assigned to different rooms, so after the exam, we just texted each other to meet outside. And honestly, the exam was more stressful than I expected. I even joked that I felt like a real police officer while answering the test! Good thing I had some background from my security-related job at that time, kay somehow it helped me get through.

After the exam, Mama treated us to lunch. Gutom kaayo mi, and the heat didn’t help either, so that meal felt like heaven.

Looking back, that moment was a mix of impulse and support — a simple act that led to something bigger. Sometimes, it’s really those unexpected decisions that open new doors. Even though things between us didn’t last, I’ll always be grateful for that moment — when a small act of love and support became a meaningful chapter in my life.

Her Love Still Lives in Me

When Mama passed away in May 2018, murag ni-collapse akong kalibutan. Everything happened so sudden, so unexpected, nga murag di pa ko katuo. The pain was too much, but I didn’t allow myself to really feel it. Instead, I kept myself busy — magpangita kog buhaton, mag-ukay-ukay ug trabaho — thinking nga if I stayed busy, maybe di ko kaayo ma-feel ang kasakit.

I handled almost everything — the arrangements, the errands, all the little details nga kinahanglan buhaton. I was everywhere, trying so hard not to break down. People might have thought strong ko, but the truth is, I was just trying to survive each day without falling apart.

Pag-human sa tanan, when everything finally settled down, that’s when it hit me. I went inside Mama and Papa’s room. The moment I entered, murag na-freeze ang time. I just stood there, staring at the bed, the things she used to touch, and the quiet that filled the room. Murag bug-at kaayo ang hangin. Then out of nowhere, tears just started falling.

Katong tanan nga akong gipugong for days, suddenly came out. I cried so hard, friend. Murag akong heart gi-pisil. I didn’t even know unsa akong gibati — kasakit, kalibog, numbness, tanan nag-mix. My heart just went numb, maybe because it couldn’t handle too much pain at once.

The days that followed felt blurry. The world suddenly felt different — colder, emptier. Every time I woke up, I still expected to hear Mama’s voice, but wala na. And every time ma-realize nako nga wala na gyud siya, the pain came back all over again. I kept asking myself, “Unsaon man nako ni? How do I go on without her?”

But life goes on, even if it’s hard. Little by little, I learned to move forward. One day at a time. Mama’s voice may be gone, but her love stayed — and that’s what kept me going.

I remember our last talk in the ICU. She looked at me, weak but still thinking about us, and said softly, “Atimana baya ninyo inyong Papa ha.” I forced a smile and said, “Ayaw ana, Ma. Diba magpulis pa ko? Ubanan pa ko nimo.” But deep inside, I knew what she meant. I just didn’t want to accept it.

That moment stayed with me. Every word, every look. I wanted so much for her to see me become the person she believed I could be. I can still remember when she accompanied me to file for the NAPOLCOM Entrance Exam. I was nervous, but having her there made me brave. When the results came out and I passed, grabe ka-happy si Mama. Makita gyud sa iyang nawong nga proud kaayo siya.

After that, she became my daily alarm clock. “Sige na, bangon, mag-jogging ta,” she would say early in the morning. She wanted me to be ready for when I’d apply to the PNP. That was our small routine — her way of showing support, of pushing me to chase my dream.

But then, kalit lang, wala na siya. Murag gi-kawatan kog kalig-on. The person who was my strength and inspiration was suddenly gone.

Even now, it still hurts, knowing she didn’t get to see everything I achieved. Pero bisan wala na siya physically, I can feel her presence. When I finally applied to the PNP, I could feel her guiding me — like she was holding my hand, telling me, “Kaya ra lagi na nimo.”

I believe she’s still with me, watching over me every step of the way. Maybe not in the way I hoped, but in the way I need.

Mama may be gone, but her love lives on — in my heart, in my dreams, in everything I do. She’s still here, reminding me that I was loved deeply, and that love will always be my strength.

Accepting the Past and Embracing the Future

    Looking back at everything that happened, I can't help but feel sad about the situation. Despite my attempts to change things, I realized that I can't undo the past. So now, I choose to just accept it because it's over, and there's no going back. From here on, I'll just keep moving forward and focus on the opportunity that lie ahead. 

   It's okay to look back at the past, but never try to change it but learn from it.

Valencia City Half Marathon (My 5Km Category)

    Sa akong mga pagdagan, ang tinuod nako nga kalaban dili ang uban kundi ang akong kaugalingon. It's not about beating others, but about overcoming my own limits —ang pagsukol sa kakapoy ug ang pagtuo nga kaya nako. Every step reminds me that ako ra gihapong kaugalingon akong kakampi. My determination pushes me to keep going, bisan sa kakapoy. In the end, ang tinuod nako nga kompetisyon dili uban kundi ang akong kaugalingon. So, every kilometer is a discovery nga ang akong pinakusgan nga ally mao ra gihapon ang akong kaugalingon. Anaa sa akong kasingkasing ug panghunahuna ang gahom to reach my goals (to cross that finish line 🏁😎), and only I can take myself there.

Anyway, proud 5K Category Finisher here. ❤️️😂

   A month or two ago, gi-invite ko sa akong igsoon nga mag-join sa ilang e-organized nga run this coming August 2024. Honestly, wala gyud ko’y excitement ato. I told him, “Sure, I’ll think about it,” pero deep down, dili gyud ko interesado kay naa pa koy personal issues with my family, labi na ani akong igsoon (disappointed). This made me even less inclined to participate. Pero gi set aside japon ang personal issues kay supportahan ta kay igsoon ta na. I decided to ask akong partner, si El-el, if she wanted to join too, thinking nga basin iyang enthusiasm maka-motivate nako. As expected, super excited kaayo siya ug dayon niingon nga “Yes!” Her energy was so contagious, pero wa gihapon nako matangtang akong mga doubts.

    But as the days passed, nakita nako nga seryoso kaayo si El-el about the run. She kept talking about it, and her excitement made me rethink my decision. Bisag unsa pa kalagot nako sa akong igsoon, I realized nga dili nako gusto i-let down si El-el. Gusto nako ipakita nga I support her, so after some reflection, I made the final decision—nag-register gyud ko for the run.

    Even after signing up, wala gihapon ko’y gana. Dili ko gusto mag-jog, mag-training, or even think about running. The only thing nga nag-keep nako going was the thought nga this wasn’t just for the run, pero para sa akong health na pud. And, of course, to show my support for El-el. Lisod kaayo, especially with all the negative feelings nga naa nako, pero I kept reminding myself nga this was more than just a race—it was about being there for my partner and taking a step towards better health.

            Thank you to the Valencia City Half Marathon, organizers and sponsors for making this run possible. Your hard work and support created an incredible experience for all of us runners. Looking forward to more events like this (on time)!

Echoes of Regret: A Letter to Mama Deling

One of the biggest regrets I carry with me is tied to a simple invitation from my mama. She once invited me to spend a vacation with her in her hometown — that place full of her memories and childhood stories. It was a chance to see her world, to know her beyond being just my mother.

Pero ingon ana gyud siguro ang life — usahay muabot ang mga panahon nga gusto ta, pero di gyud kaya. Back then, I really wanted to go, but we just didn’t have the budget. The struggle was real, and I had to say no, thinking naa pa’y next time, naa pa’y sunod nga higayon.

Time passed. Things changed. I got a stable job, nakasugod ug work, and finally had the means to travel. Pero mao pud to, busy na kaayo sa trabaho. I had the money, but not the time. Life flipped its own coin — before, we had time but no money; now, we had money but no time. Mama went to her hometown alone that year. After a week or two, she came home. Everything seemed fine. Normal ra kaayo. Until the unthinkable happened.

Riding the bus is one of my favorite things, especially when
holding your hand and leaning on your shoulder.

when I was your watcher

Mama was admitted to the hospital. The news hit me hard. Suddenly, all my reasons — work, duties, obligations — felt so small. I rushed to her side, stayed with her for days. After three days, she was discharged. We were so happy, thinking okay na siya, nga naka-recover na. But that same night, after a small celebration sa trabaho, I came home to worried faces. My sibling told me Mama was in pain again — stomach pain daw, like before. We thought okay ra, kaya pa massage or pahulay lang. But this time, lahi na. She asked to be brought back to the hospital.

At that moment, kabalo na ko. I felt it deep inside — something was wrong. The past few days replayed in my head, and I found myself whispering silent prayers, begging for another chance. But deep down, I knew. I really knew.

Then came the day that changed everything.

May 24, 2018 — 6:20 in the morning. Mama was gone.

That moment… I can still feel it. The weight, the silence, the disbelief. I wasn’t just grieving her loss — I was grieving the time I lost with her. The “next time” I thought I’d always have. The vacation I didn’t take. The moments I could’ve said “Ma, kuyog ta.”

Until now, that regret stays with me. It’s a quiet reminder that time will never wait. That love, when left for later, sometimes never finds its turn.

Until we meet again

Dear Mama Deling,

        I miss you every day. Not a moment goes by without thinking of you and the love you gave so freely. I wish I could turn back time, to share more laughs, more stories, and more moments with you. Thank you for everything you've done for me, for the wisdom you shared, and for the endless love you showed. I carry you in my heart always, and I hope you're watching over us, smiling.

        I love you, Mama. Until we meet again.

Kweenie

Next Page: From Plant Worker to Office Personnel

A Defining Moment: My Journey from Plant Worker to Security OFFICER/Secretary

A month or two after ko nagsugod trabaho sa plant — kato bitaw nga among trabaho kay magbutang ug sticker sa cellophane para sa saging — naa ra duol ana ang Security Office. One day during break time, naa’y ni-approach namo nga lalaki gikan sa Security Section. He introduced himself as the admin didto, unya niingon siya nga nangita daw sila ug college graduate para sa secretary position. The job required someone nga kabalo mo-handle ug computer — which was, luckily, akong forte.

While he was talking, nadungog nako akong mga kauban nga murag gi-mention akong name. Murag gi-recommend ba, and deep inside I felt like, “hala, this might be my chance!” So without thinking twice, ni-raise dayon ko sa akong kamot, showing interest. That one brave move opened the door for an interview — ug mao to ang sinugdanan sa usa ka defining moment sa akong career.

Pag-abot sa interview, didto nako na-realize nga daghan diay mi applicants. Most of them were in formal attire, ug ang uban kay naka security guard uniform pa gyud. The job required a security license — nga wala gyud koy ikapakita. Honestly, medyo na-intimidate ko ato.

Pero instead of giving up, I focused on what I had — akong degree ug computer skills. I held on to that confidence nga maybe, mao ni akong edge. After about a week of waiting, I got the call — I was chosen for the position! It felt surreal. That moment made me realize nga when it’s meant for you, it really finds its way.

Growth and Perseverance.

Pagkasugod nako sa trabaho, wala na koy paglangan. Diretso gyud ko sa role. My tasks were everything under the sun — dili lang secretary nga puro papel. I handled documents, brewed coffee, cleaned, and even cooked! HAHA! It was the kind of job nga dapat flexible ka ug kabalo mo-adjust.

At first, super awkward kay ako ra’y babaye sa section, and the youngest pa gyud. On my first day, gusto ko magpakita nga kaya nako. So I came early, prepared, and motivated. Pero wala gyud ko nag-expect sa akong first assignment.

The Head Security Officer called me and said, “Come with me to the market.” I was like, “Hala unsa kaha ni?” But I just smiled and followed. We rode in the vehicle, and I just went with the flow. When we got back, mao diay — ako ang magluto sa mga gipamalit! That time, I swear, nag-ampo ko sa tanan santos nga akong nahinumduman! HAHA!

I didn’t even know asa ang kalan, unsaon paggamit, or unsa akong galutoon. I almost cried kay murag grabe ka-challenging for my first day. Pero thankful kaayo ko kay my coworkers were very supportive. They helped me, guided me, and made me feel like I belonged.

That day, I realized — sometimes, growth doesn’t happen in comfort. It happens when you say “yes” to things you’ve never done before.

🍌 D O L E  N-S K Y  F A M  🍌

1 Photo (Half a million boxes in 28Ds! Achieved), 2 (Security Admin, Sir Agustin and our "Container Van" Office), 3 (Me and Maymay hatod ug radio sa Gate Guard), 4 (My Boss/Model, Sir Salting(Left), HR Manager (Right), Sir Rodriguez, 5 (My Dole NorthSky Fam), 6 (Me, making face in the office with the gifts prepared for our party)

As time went by, naka-adjust ra gyud ko sa tanan. From making coffee and entertaining guests, to preparing presentations and handling all the admin tasks — naanad ra gyud ko sa dagan sa trabaho. Kada adlaw naa gyud bagong challenge, pero with each one, mas ni-grow ko ug mas ni-gain kog confidence. Bitaw, the more ko na-expose sa work, the more ko naka-realize nga kaya ra diay basta pursigido lang ka ug open ka to learn.

A Defining Start: My Post-College Hustle and the 50-Peso Realization

After graduating from college in 2016, parehas ra siguro ko sa ubang bag-ong graduate — chill mode sa. 😅 After all those sleepless nights and puyo sa classroom, murag deserve man pud ang gamayng pahulay. For the first few months, okay ra ang life nga walay pressure — tulog, kaon, laag, repeat. Pero after a while, nagsugod na kog ma-bored. Kay halos tanan nakong classmates kay naanay trabaho, and I started thinking, hala, basin ako ra’y nabilin sa waiting area sa kinabuhi. 😅

So I told myself, “Dili pwede ani. I need to move.” Mao to, ni-decide ko nga mubalik sa BIR — mao tong government office nga didto ko nag OJT. Nag-volunteer lang sa ko samtang nangita ug permanent job. Para at least, productive gihapon ba, ug naa koy connection sa field nga gusto nako sudlan.

While nagpadayon ko sa pagpang-apply, nagsugod pud tong endless process — gathering requirements, preparing for interviews, ug syempre, practicing unsay isulti. Then, the day of my first ever real interview came. Grabe, mixed emotions! Excited pero kulba kaayo. This time, dili na practice-practice lang — this was it, the real deal.

Pag-abot nako sa office, kalma pa unta ko. Pero pag gawas sa interviewer, murag na-shock ko gamay. 😅 Dili man sa pag-judge, pero honestly, iyang appearance kay medyo intimidating. Gamay siya, medyo nakuyos ug lawas, ug seryoso kaayo ang aura. So imagine unsa akong gibati — heart racing, hands sweaty. Pero gi-remind nako akong self: “Hoy, focus! You’re here for your future, not for fashion show.”

So I smiled, sat down, and answered every question with all my might. Asa ko ni-graduate, unsay skills, unsay ma-offer nako. Then out of nowhere, giingnan ko nga naa silay opening for secretary. I thought, hala, mao na ni? Excited pero curious pud.

Pero mao ni ang twist — probationary daw, ug 50 pesos per day lang ang allowance. FIFTY. PESOS. 😭 Internally, ako na lang giingnan akong self, “Okay, kalma lang… experience ra ni.” Pero deep inside, nagkatawa ko ug gamay kay murag pamlete ra man ni padulong trabaho.

Lunch break came, ug while sakay ko ug rela pauli, I kept thinking about it. “Fifty pesos a day? Mao na to akong sweldo? Murag mas dako pa akong allowance sauna.” 😅 I couldn’t decide kung magkatawa ba ko or maguol.

Pag-abot nako sa balay, I told my Mama everything — from the interview, the offer, and yes, that famous 50 pesos. Pagkadungog niya, iyang reaction kay priceless: “Ha?! Singkwenta pesos ra imong sweldo sa usa ka adlaw?!” 😳 Murag naa gyud siyay nakita nga injustice sa kalibutan.

She looked at me seriously and said, “Aha man na inyo office? Adtoan ko na, ayaw nag balik didto.” Then she added, “Naa kay number nila? Tawagan nako!” — classic Mama moment, haha! Pero bitaw, naa siyay punto. She told me nga mas dako pa akong baon sauna kaysa sa sweldo nga gi-offer. And that hit hard.

That day, I realized something important — starting your career doesn’t mean accepting anything that comes your way. It’s about knowing your worth and finding the right start. My Mama’s words were a wake-up call, ug nakasabot ko nga dili lang basta makasulod ug trabaho, dapat makasulod sa saktong lugar.

So I doubled down on my job hunt — apply here, apply there, send resume, check emails, repeat. Every rejection hurt, pero I didn’t give up. Then one day, a call came from my Papa’s cousin — my aunt. She said, “Nag-hiring amo company. Try daw apply.” Hala, murag gihatagan kog paglaom balik.

Excited kaayo ko. Nag-prepare dayon ko ug requirements, gi-set akong mind nga this could be it. Pag-abot nako sa venue, I was shocked — daghan kaayong applicants! My first thought: “Aguy, grabe nga competition ni.” 😅

Pero pag-abot sa orientation, kalit lang giingon nga — accepted na diay tanan! 😭 I couldn’t help but laugh. The tension instantly melted away. Gi-explain sa amo nga ang trabaho kay magbutang ug stickers sa cellophane para sa export nga saging. Dili man siya glamoroso nga trabaho, pero it was a start. A humble, grateful start.

And that’s where my real journey began.

This is only a sample output of our work

That experience was something else. It was far from easy—applying stickers to cellophane all day, with our pay based on the weight of the work we completed. The more I did it, the more I realized just how tough this kind of work really is. It wasn’t mentally challenging, but physically, it was exhausting. It amazed me how demanding the job was, and it gave me a new level of respect for the people who do this kind of work every day.

It was a real eye-opener for me, showing that no matter how simple a task might seem, there’s always hard work behind it.

This was my first paying job, and it turned out to be a memorable experience. I really enjoyed it and learned a lot along the way. From the initial excitement of securing a job to the reality of physically demanding work, it was a journey full of surprises and lessons.

I met a diverse group of people—some with college degrees, others with only high school education, individuals from abroad, married folks, and singles. Despite the hard work, we shared many laughs and built a sense of camaraderie. Listening to my colleagues’ stories and experiences was a valuable part of the job, teaching me not only about work but also about life.

Mao to nga this job taught me a lot. It taught me perseverance, nga bisag kapoy, padayon lang. It taught me not to settle for less, nga okay ra magsugod sa ubos basta di ka magpabilin didto. And most of all, it taught me the joy of connection — nga bisan unsa pa imong background, kung magtinabangay mo, mahimo ra gyud ang lisod.

That job — simple as it was — became one of the best starting chapters sa akong career. Kapoy, yes. Pero rewarding kaayo. ❤️